January 16, 2015

Tips for Telling Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

Divorce Trends, Illinois divorce lawyer, Illinois family law attorney, Marriage

Initiating a divorce can be extremely difficult and emotional. However, once all other options have been explored and you are ready to begin the process, it is important to seek legal counsel. Working with an experienced professional from the onset of the process can help to save time and money, and it can also provide you with a degree of confidence and know-all.

If you decide to speak with a lawyer before speaking with your spouse, an attorney can help you to determine the best way to approach the subject. Additionally, there are several tips to consider when initiating the conversation of divorce with your spouse.

According to Psychology Today, the most important tip to bear in mind is anticipating your spouse’s shock or surprise at the news. If you suspect your spouse will be very surprised, it may take him or her longer to accept the divorce. Your spouse may even try to change your mind and talk you out of your decision.

Also, be sure to allot a significant amount of time for this conversation. Do not attempt to have it while you are in the process of doing something else or when you have an outstanding time commitment. Speak in first-person sentences that express your emotions, and do not minimize the emotional strain it has taken you to get to this point.

Finally, Psychology Today recommends that you resist the urge to defend yourself and critique your spouse’s failings as a husband or wife. The time to tell your spouse about what he or she has done wrong has passed. “Instead of recounting who did what to whom, you must simply say that the marriage has not worked for a long time,” suggests Psychology Today.

This may be exceptionally difficult, especially if your spouse tries to put you on the offense. Resist the temptation to argue. If you or someone you know is considering divorce and ready to speak with a lawyer, contact an experienced DuPage County family law attorney today.